Somebody who was in the locker room after the Cowboys were thumped in Minnesota wanted to tell the Musers what the scene was like.

Of course, he wanted his voice disguised for obvious reasons.

Tony Romo turned on Garrett and threw him up against the wall and started screaming profanities at him … or kinda. Then everyone turned on him.

When Spencer threw Roy Williams a broad sword, something very familiar to the season happened.

Brooking, oddly ran into a Cuban look-alike contest and won.

The most shocking was Jerry Jones and his toupees flying off the handle.

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On a sports hangover day, Musers were able to get the fake coaches on to talk with the Musers.

Jerry says he has a .357 barrel in his mouth.

Wade comes on and is somber too, but keeps wondering off into happiness.

Then the pronunciation of “Favre” really threw Wade off.

They both end the segment, and year, in song…

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This is some old audio from fake Jerry.

He’s making predictions on the Dallas Cowboys season many years ago.

Glad to know they’ve turned things around in the owners eyes.

No more Q-Car jokes, but this is a lot funnier now.

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After a regular season finale against the hated Eagles, where the Cowboys mopped the floor with that Eagle arse in a shutout, the Musers talked to the fake coaches.

Jerry was pretty excited about the whole win and explained how the video screen turned off during the game…apparently it was due to Jerry Jr. having a rats nest of cables from his video game console.

Wade was pretty excited too, telling Jerry he is ready to sign that extension when he’s ready. Then he goes into a story about crapping himself on an elevator with some Cowboy fans.

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A new name for Jerry & Wade … JADE. Like the tabloids do with other couples. “Team Jade”

Jerry says he’s still drunk from the game the other night.

He even offers Wade an extension on his contract through one more week.

Wade thinks they won the super bowl, but then goes into the great food at the super dome.

Then there was some confusion on where the Redskins played.

Wonder if team Jade would sing a xmas carol for us?

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Another loss, another week with the fake coaches.

Jerry is disappointed but looks forward to a new head coach.

Wade comes on and puts his positive spin on everything.

Then Wade goes into how his eyes hurt after wearing the 3D glasses.

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Fake Jerry enjoys his stagium.

Says there’s not many TD’s happening in the stagium.

Fake Wade is happy for the win and that Jerry kept the roof closed.

He asks how the “wonder boy” is doing on the offensive side of the ball. Talks high of his defense.

We might have thought Wade had emotion at the end of first half, but come to find out, he was mad about food.

Then Jerry takes a shot at 105.3 the Fan, saying the numbers are horrible.

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Musers talked to the fake coaches after the bye week.

Surprisingly, fake Wade watched some movies, in particular, Finding Nemo.

He wanted to know if they ever found him or not.

Then fake Wade had some ‘confugion’ on where Washington Redskins were from.

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Fake Jerry starts off by saying the game was as embarrassing as the time he sharted in his pants.

Then Wade comes on and is really confused thinking we played the Dallas Texans and where they played in Dallas.

Jerry tells Wade how he’s embarrassing with his goofy celebrations and getting tangled in the headset.

Then the subject of U2 show comes up and Wade wants to go to the show.

Then Wade & Jerry break off into a U2 song, “Where the Streets Have No Name”.

Jerry then tells the story about trying to get rid of Wade but Wade winds up back to the surprise of Jerry.

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After a big win at the Death Star Stagium, the fake coaches pop on with the D&M show.

Jerry starts off pretty excited saying Jimmy Johnson was overrated.

Then he introduces “Mr. Fix It” on to the call. Wade told his Defense to “Gets Going”.

Wade also tells a story how he got Bobby Carpenter to get the crowd going with some clapping.

Then Wade tells Jerry about his ‘bathroom air’ and confesses about the FBI being after him for an odd reason.

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Cowboys lose to Giants, 33-31 at the first home game at the Death Star.

Fake Jerry talks about how special the stagium is and wasn’t aware of the score.

Fake Wade was clearly upset, he had eaten something bad from the concession line.

Then Jerry goes off on Wade when he thinks he’s off air.

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      Jerry & Wade Midgias

Fake Jerry & Wade were on to discuss the pre-season loss to the 49ers.

Jerry said according to quickbooks, he’s paid for the stagium after two pre-season games.

Then Wade jumped on all excited about getting on to the dumb penalty, even though he wasn’t sure what happened.

An interview with Wade wouldn’t be right without talk about food’n fishin. He did a lot of fishing outside the stagium. And they both liked the “vigio board”. Wade even admitted to seeing a camel toe on one of the cheerleaders on the vigio board.

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        Jerry Mullet Jones

As mentioned in the previous post, with the absence of any connections with the Cowboys, The Ticket is back to their onslaught of pushing the envelope of jokes directed towards Jerry Jones and the Cowboys. All well deserved.

Today before the Wade Phillips press conference, Jerry Jones got up and went on about a 20 minute conversation about, well, I’m not real sure what he was saying. I think it was something to do with cheaper tickets in the general public type sections of the new stadium.

Anyhow, he rambled and rambled forever, all the while, Corby, Rhynes & Grubes spoke over what he was saying with Goobes playing the perfect drops as if someone was answering Jerry’s questions and/or comments. Figured it was worth a post.

My personal favorite was what Norm told Mike he had in his pants!!! Genius.

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Fake Jerry Jones and Fake Wade Phillips paid a visit with the Musers today.

The gag has been lifted from Wade, although he says he never had one to begin with.

Jerry hoped Wade would read the lines he gave him, but he wound up talking about biscuits and ham.

Then gave the truth about why T.O. was cut. And that the new ’stagia’ was breaking him.

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T.NO - Bye Bye

News came down tonight that T.O. got the boot.

Apparently he’s traveling and doesn’t even know yet. I think it would be hilarious if the entire country knew before he did.

Great player, but damn. I won’t be sad to see all the drama disappear. I mean, the Cowboys carry enough press and don’t need a drama queen adding to it.

Roy Williams (the real) needs to pull up those pants and get ready to be the man.

Way to go Jerry for growing a sac and actually cutting him.

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