Musers have their normal Monday morning conversation with fake Jerry & fake Wade.

The Cowboys beat the Falcons and fake Jerry & Wade are real happy.

So happy, they were throwing punch line after punch line and Wade didn’t even talk about food or fishing.

Poor Miles Austin, fake Wade comments about his smile.

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Starts out with Jerry who talks about the stagium in Tampa.

He says Jerry Jr. really wants a pirate ship in the Death Star, so Jerry says he’ll put one in the Cowboys stagium.

Then Wade comes on and they ask him about his horrible sun glasses. He says it’s him doing the terminator, then does an imitation.

Wade explains where he got the sun glasses which came from Chuckie Cheese. He earned enough tickets from skeet ball.

Then to end the interview, Wade stumbles off into fishing and Wade’s diet.

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Musers spoke with the coach and owner of the Cowboys.

Jerry wanted to let everyone know they have a new stagium and a new attitude. With a video screen bigger than a two post office town.

Wade jumped on to explain the mess of last nights game. Then he obviously started reading something Jerry gave him to say about the new stadium with chili-dogs.

He said he lost his appetite, but still picked up 7 burgers at in and out. Then he goes off into telling Cowboy fans about the great burgers at Cowboys stadium.

Then this thing turns into a big advertisement about the new stagium.

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        Wade Phillips & Jerry Jones

A new year with the Dallas Cowboys marks a new year with The Ticket and the Cowboys.

The Ticket has no official ties with the Cowboys now. They’ve moved on to the station no one listens to, The FAN, which cock blocked Georgie Ja Dunham from being the stadium PA guy. It sucks for The Ticket, but it really sucks for Georgie.

What does all this mean? It means there is no holding back now with fake Jerry & fake Wade, among other things.

In this episode of fake J&W, Jerry begins talking about how excited they are to be practicing in the Alamo dome.

Fake Wade hit the emphaaasis button, and is excited. Then started talking about wearing one piece bathing suites. Of course, then he goes into eating sausage and watching Springer, pancakes stacked 20 high and discussion of penile extensions.

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Ahhh, football season is warming up thank goodness. I just can’t handle all baseball talk, all the time.

Musers spoke with the fake Wade Phillips and fake Tony Romo about how mini-camps are going, along with things they’ve been working on during the off-season.

Fake Wade tells us how he went to the opposite of anger management class, called “anger class”. He’s trying to be more serious and angry.

Fake Romo tells us how he’s been hitting more golf balls and playing more rounds of golf.

Then, as usual, fake Wade falls back to what he knows best…food. He tells Romo how he’s been eating funyuns for his diet. Then goes on about why they’re called “funyuns”.

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Wade Phillips & Jerry Jones

Jerry sounded more confusing than ever.

Wade actually sounded more sane this time.

Jerry referenced animals and their sounds again, then blamed a lot on his “sons”.

Wade explained a good draft…Miller Genuine Draft with iced cold scoop of mayonnaise with crumbles of cornbread.

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Jerry brought on a gagged fake Wade, which he allowed to speak, finally. Then told him to put the gag back in. Wade was upset about losing his fishin’ partner.

During the conversation, a surprise caller jumped in…fake Parcells. He voiced his opinions how “the player” was disruptive. Still sounds like he has a mouthful of gauze.

(picture inspired by)

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Fake Jerry was on with the Musers this morning, with a very short visit from a gagged fake Wade.

Wade was asked questions about football and he spoke like a Charlie Brown character. Well, until he asked him about foot which he removed the gag and spoke.

Jerry spoke of the new stagia, which he referred to as “The Glory Hole”.

Chipotle + Pawn Shop = Burrito while selling wedding ring.

“Pretty interesting stuff fer sure”!

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This could be the last we hear of fake Jerry and fake Wade until next season, but something tells me we have a time or two left.

Today The Musers talked to the fake coaches about change and thoughts of the teams still in it.

Jerry is sick to his stomach and only cares about Cowboys.

Wade looks on the positive side, of course, saying we “almost” made the playoffs.

Jerry also says he had another face lift that makes him look like Will Smith, since Will Smith never has “crigisizms”.

Wade is picking the Steelers to win since they have better concessions.

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The final game of the season was a complete karate chop to the family jewels…

Fake Jerry is pissed. Fake Wade is happy and positive.

Fake Jerry asked Wade to come up with 10 reasons why he shouldn’t fire him. His list was all positive outlooks.

During the call someone calls in and Jerry tells this person a new job might be on the way.

Probably the last time we hear from these guys this season.

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2 MORE 2 PLAY!

After a really wild week in the media about private meetings and feelings getting hurt, to arguments and near physical altercations.

Fake Jerry seems a little upset, especially towards MB3. He tells fake Wade to “shut up” several times. He also tells about a little altercation between his boys over who got the front seat in their suite.

Fake Wade thinks the last two games are the Pro Bowl and he’s not sure of the other’n.

Wade talks about food, as usual, except this week he’s all about dessert. Soft serve, puddin’, all kinds of pies baked by Grandma Wade.

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Weekly visit with the fake Jerry Jones and fake Wade Phillips.

Cowboys get another win against the Seattle Seahawks on Thanksgiving Day.

Jerry took Wade hunting over the weekend.

Wade shot up Jerry’s truck going after a squirrel who was after Wade’s nuts.

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Turns into a win. A good win.

Fake Jerry & Wade talk about the win. Wade is pretty excited and is often confusing.

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Fake Jerry is getting a little upset about Wade and has a new list of future coaches.

Fake Wade just tries to put a positive spin on things.

Campo is a water boy? Eats deer corn? Domesticated?

More food talk.

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Fake Jerry Jones & Fake Wade Phillips talk about the Cowboys & Bengals game. (I know it was last week)

Wade, again, goes into burger talk, duck talk, grill talk and so on.

Not much football talk, though.

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