His superior German engineering gives us the ultimate basketball experience.

He says he was powered by something that doesn’t exist anymore.

Then he compares his teeth to some other familiar Mavs person, saying it powers him.

Poor Dirk also says he no longer has sex anymore.

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If you were arrested for trying to fraud the big German, Dirk, if you had one phone call, who would it be?

The Musers, of course.

Christal says she went by Dirk’s commands and tried to be a different girls every night of the week.

Crystal also tells stories of how bad Dirk took losses.

Apparently Kristal said she put a private investigator on Dirk when he disappeared from some playoff games.

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Interesting phone call today on the Musers. They call into the Mavs facility to see if any of the Mavs wanted to talk about the stomping they were handed by an empty Spurs team.

The person to answer the phone was Fake Jason Kidd. He said he tried to laser Parker but wound up giving him lasik. Then took a jab at Mexicans.

Dirk then jumped on the phone and said he thinks everyone is plotting against him. He then says Cuban is mad at him.

Then things take a weird turn….listen

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The Musers got a number to a phone that supposedly sits in the practice room of the Dallas Mavericks.

They called in to see who they could speak with.

Luckily, the Fake Jason Kidd answered. He had some interesting sports points.

Then the Fake Dirk Nowitzki got on the phone. He isn’t happy with the Mavs.

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